I feel better with this situation and i just want to thank you all for your prayers and your thoughts. I have decided to move on it still hurts and the weekends are little rougher but I am at the point i am using the internet to meet men (it feels safer this way) but general chit chat. I pray that god bless me with the man he intends to be my husband and be a postive male figure in my daughter's life and to love her as his own. I feel sorry for her dad he is the one that is missing out of her life regardless if he is with me or not. I am a good woman and all I was trying to do is love him and be there for him. I pray and hope that god does touch his heart and have him realized what he has done. I typed him an email a couple of weeks ago and he finally has read it on 8/24 i typed the email on 8/13. I know his email password i created his account and he had me make up the pass word. so i didn't pry to find it if people are wondering. But in the email i was asking him for the keys (he has the pool key and that cost $100) and if he wanted his things. he has an aunt that i told him he can drop it off and I can pick up my keys and leave his things there. this way we didn't have to see each other at all just tell me when he dropped it off so i can go over there. I let him know he decided to do this and we need to move on with out lives without him as through he doesn't exist. AT THIS POINT HE HASN'T REPLIED. I don't know if he doesn't care or it's his guilt or he realized now that he can't continue to do this to us an i am putting my foot down for good.

i am a little blue please pray for me my daughter is doing better since she started school. I discovered her father is done logged on to dating sites. I don't want him anymore but this hurts because he can't even reply with an email. He has a title of "always a gentleman" well i changed it to "manic depression biopolar disorder" I shouldnt' of done that but I figured you can be at least honest about yourself. Pray for me to move on from this. pray that the man that is intended for me comes so that I can have a family and live my life the way god intends on me doing. thank you everyone that has pray for me and my daughter god bless

Hello everyone i want to say thanks for all the prayers and thoughts. Things are getting better for my mine daughter and I still looking for a part time job still struggling but my health is good and my daughter's health is good and that is priceless. I do have a situation that came up that I do need your prayers. I fell back in love with someone from my past he is someone that I always love but put my feelings for him in the back burner because i thought our relationship was something that we would have to meet each other in the next lifetime. why do i say this it's because he has a children by my finance's sister. Now I know that sounds bad but when i break down the story you will understand. His name is carl and we became friends at first he was jeff's (my former finance's friend) from years ago. Carl and jeff's sister were messing around and had a child. and we all used to hang out for the kids. Jeff was being him vanishing and all and i continued to come over for the kids to play (this has been over 10 years) like i said earlier our friendship began and our realtionship blossom. We dated for 3 years during that time I felt bad for jeff's sister i never intended on hurting her or betrayed as far as my former finance he done so much i didn't care what he thought. Carl had truly shown me what love was, of course we had obstacles in our way. He had more to deal with because in order to see his children jeff's sister used the kids to get back at him due to her bitterness. It didn't bother me because his family and friends thought that what jeff deserve due to all the bad things he has done to me. It also didn't affect me because i am the product of that type of relationship my parents were married to siblings and then they got married and had me. To make a long story short my brothers and sister on both sides mom and dad are first cousins. My parents had it work and i figure i can do. But carl couldn't hadnled the stress and we just broke apart. I never had bitterness or anger towards him and we remained friends of course i never let jeff know. And due to this relationship Jeff has tried to kill me which made carl upset. He used to keep up with his where abouts for my safety during this time. I returned back to jeff because i did what that family for my daughter and i felt the relationship with carl will never be. I love jeff for my daughter and dealt with alot of crap because of that. But carl i just knew i was going to meet him at the altar i even sign up for tie the knot .com the wedding registry. 4 years ago carl got locked up for drugs his friends set him up the same friends i used to tell him i didn't trust carl just didn't want to believe me. I wrote to him as a friend to let him know i was here for him. When jeff got lock up i felt more compell to be there for him since we was together. I moved back home due to financiall problems and didn't want to rock the boat having jeff write to me from prison from (my dad hates him) then to have another man write me from another prison. i didn't want to piss my dad off he's old school and didn't belive in that kind of thing. I stop writing binky and i felt so guilt and bad for just not writing to him. This is a small world my girlfriend has a boyfriend in prison in SC and carl got transfer to the same camp. He became friends with the guy and realized he dates my girlfriend he started asking about me wanting me to write and visit. My girlfriend wanted to give jeff respect and we all belived jeff changed his ways wanting a family and she never told me. Well after jeff has done this again vanishing i thought about my friend and how i stopped writing him and wrote to him. he quickly responded back we have been communicating for 3 or 4 weeks now and the love i have for him came out like a burst of energy. i told him all what happen to me and aplogoized for stopped writing as cold as i did and the reason why. Since they was friends he told me his concerns about jeff very detailed in a very honest and truthful manner concern as friend. things years ago i wouldn't belive but now i do see the light for myself and all he has done was confirm. Jeff has mental problems that he is aware of but instead of dealing with them he looks as through i am the problem. I fell back in love with him and i can't say i fell back in love with him because the love didn't go anywhere. the sister she has moved on with a new boyfriend and our realtionship is now a friendship. the kids are older where before they was young when we need dated. the problem he is going to be release 2014 i can't allow myself to wait until then but gosh i love him. the fed are going to cut time for men with drug charges but no one will know until 11/01/07. I not going to say he's an angel but he did it to support his kids and when we dated he did alot for mine. Where her own father is doing nothing but riding a bike not thinking of his own child. it hurts me that this man is locked up. we are able to communicate about everything and anything he truly has touch my heart and sould. please pray for me and carl so that he can be out again

I did something today that i feel alittle guilty about but i feel i just did alittle bit of self justice to the situatio. I found out the physical address where jeff lives. He has 3 warrants for his arrest where he stole checks from a part time job i had cleaning a builidng one day a week. This happen 2 weeks before we moved into our home. I wanted to believe him he said the police dusted his fingerprints off from the building and was trying to frame him because he already has a record. Where all the proof shows he has done it. The police were coming to my home and the time of day they came was right after my daughter got home from school. it scared her so bad, when the police finally came to the house when i was home i explained to them that they was scaring a 13 yr old girl. I have taught her not to open the door but they had her alarmed and she would call me from work. they ask me if i knew of his where abouts and if i ever find out and give them a call. in return they stop coming to the house. Well today i found out the address and call the police station and gave them the information. I feel bad in a way because i guess from growing up you don't tell on people it's being a snitch or a rat. but in the real world all grown up. he has done some much wrong to me and my daughter it's time for him to answer to all his wrong doings to us and the law. please pray for me i prayed for forgiveness i know justice is for the lord to do